Hello good people of Goodyear!
I hope whoever is reading this is having a lovely day! I write to you as I have a problem that I believe you will be able to help with and it has to do with your shiny blue blimp. As an aviation enthusiast, blimps have always fascinated me because, well, blimps are awesome. So awesome in fact that I get happy with the sight of one which leads to my problem and the reason I’m writing to you today.
I recently moved to New York City where there is often a blimp hovering nearby which is highly distracting as I will stare at it for way too long because, as I previously mentioned, they are awesome. However, due to their awesomeness, your blimp has become problematic for me. If there is a blimp in the city, my work and career suffer as I have no other option but to watch with a stupid grin on my face as this beautiful blimp slowly glides with the wind with no final destination. As the blimp circles round and round the city, the clocks on the wall go round and round as well as I sit back and daydream what it would be like to be up in the air with the birds on that beautiful blimp.
So, I think to myself how do I solve this problem so I do not end up unemployed and homeless? Surely there has to be a solution to this problem, right? Here is what I’ve come up:
1) Shut the blinds of the window? NO! I work on the 37th story of a building in midtown with the greatest view a country boy from Colorado could ever dream of. Not an option!
2) Move out of NYC? NO! Greatest city in the world!
3) Go on a blimp ride to satisfy my fascination? YES! Perfect solution and it would be an amazing experience. I would truly enjoy every minute of it and would be forever thankful!
So you see, if I want to remain gainfully employed to receive an income in which I pay taxes so that I can do my part to lower the national debt, I must experience a ride on a Goodyear Blimp. I’m not only doing this for myself, I’m doing this for America.
Thank you for your consideration and you have my word that I will only purchase the fine tires of Goodyear for the rest of my life because the best tires in the world have Goodyear written all over them.
Best wishes,
Steve Thomas